By M.K. Thomas
Viewing one cringe worthy episode of Say Yes to the Dress re-reminded me what a HUGE deal American brides-to-be place on the selection of their ‘perfect’ wedding dress. The one she hopes will make her mother cry, her groom light up, and her guests whisper how gorgeous she looks as she makes her way down the aisle. Shock and Awe, that’s the goal. What I learned from watching the “Reality” style TV show was this: DO NOT bring a crowd and a camera crew to the bridal shop with you and certainly DO NOT invite the public to watch. Opinions abound, feelings get hurt and in the end, all that really matters is how the bride feels, no matter what anyone else has to say about it.
If you’re engaged or married, you may be nodding your head right now or then again, you might be totally clueless about the sort of drama that precedes most wedding days.
As an experienced wedding coordinator, mother of the bride, and a former bride myself, allow me to offer you some words of advice. This is only the beginning. The first of many choices your bride will agonize over during your lifetime together. That need, that desire, to look and feel beautiful…it doesn’t go away. After the wedding, life goes on and your bride will continue to choose her clothes, her shoes, and her hair style, still hoping to make your face light up when she walks into the room. Write that down someplace and don’t forget it.
From the very beginning, in the book of Genesis 2:18-25, we see the first couple who were truly made for each other. They were living in a perfect environment and Adam’s first look at Eve was one of delight! Even under the best of circumstances, his enthusiasm for her eventually waned and he even stopped to blaming her and their Maker for his own poor choices.
The Book of Esther gives us a glimpse of the way King Xerxes bungled his first marriage and consequently had to choose her replacement. Hadassah was a beautiful Jewish orphan, later named and known as Queen Esther. The king considered her the fairest and most beautiful woman in the land, yet it seems even his affection for her cooled as well: Esther 4:11 “…Yet I myself have not been called to go in to the king these thirty days.” NASB.
But oh! After much prayer and fasting, Esther bravely broke protocol and stepped into his view, prayed up and well dressed, in her royal robes. When he saw her, he graciously welcomed her into his presence, so much so, that he generously offered her up to half his kingdom if she so desired. That was remarkable considering what happened when his first wife went against the rules. No longer seeking counsel from his advisors, he saw his queen, extended his scepter, and gave her permission to approach him. Standing on her strong convictions, Esther was instrumental in saving her people from annihilation, awarded all of Haman’s property, and then put in a place of authority as a lawmaker and decision maker.
It just goes to show you, it’s usually a physical attraction that brings couples together, but it’s their strength of character and respect for one another that keeps them together and makes their lives more fruitful in the end.
God’s favor was upon Esther, (though His name is never overtly mentioned in the book) and her story reminds us of His sovereignty and the importance of fasting, praying, and seeking His favor in even in our modern day marriages.
If you will seek Him, who knows how He will use you and your loved one to make a lasting difference in His kingdom today?
M.K. Thomas – Her story begins with a traditional mid-century upbringing. The subtle threat of the atomic age loomed large over her earliest memories. Small victories over fear followed by frequent set-backs made survival her highest goal. Then one day, a dramatic spiritual rebirth made her recovery possible. Floods, fire, divorce, illness, and financial uncertainty, served as catalysts, driving her closer to her redemption.
She is the mother of four, teacher, writer, frequent traveler, jack of many trades, and master of a few; her biblical perspective on life will equip you to face your struggles with the same courage and candor. M.K. describes herself as “an optimistic realist” as she has learned to rely on Jesus Christ, the author and finisher of her faith.